Well that was quite the episode of Desperate Housewives on Sunday I can tell you. I imagine it set water coolers around America all abuzz. It definitely surprised me. If you don’t know what I’m talking about it’s the shocker at the end of the episode involving Bree and her ultimate decision regarding her relationship […]
It looks like the streak of good writing has kept up with Desperate Housewives because we once again were treated to a good episode last week. Hopefully this means they finally hit their stride, and we can only expect bigger and better things all season. Also, this episode marks the first appearance of actor Nashawn Kearse, after cast member Page Kennedy was fired for showing people his dingleberries. And unlike fellow guest star Bob Newhart, he didn’t have enough celebrity juice to sweep it under the carpet. You’d be amazed how many people Newhart has teabagged on the set, and yet he continues on the show unscathed. I heard it from a guy who knows a guy. First though I must apologize for the lateness of the recap. I can only blame the tryptophane-induced coma I’ve been in since earlier this week.
When last we left the girls of Making the Band 3 we found out that they were going to be split into two groups and singing an opening act for the Backstreet Boys. And then we saw the girls act as if getting a chance to sing in front of tens of hundreds of people at the VT County Fair was a big deal. You know what is a big deal at the VT County Fair? The onion rings. Best I ever had.
OK, so I was kidding about the VT County Fair, they are just opening up for them on their DC leg of the tour. But it’s close. Take away the onion rings and smell of manure and you can’t tell the difference. Or heck, keep the manure smell. Who knows what that loft smells like. One look at Shannon and you can just tell she’s the type of girl who can leave a doozy of a twozy. But fear not dear reader. This episode we finally get what we have been waiting for. A topless Aubrey. Well, what I have been waiting for anyway.
Hey y’all! Y’all want more Paula Deen? Sho’ y’all do! And that’s precisely why I watched Paula’s wondrous Southern Thanksgiving special from last year this week on the Food Network. I have to admit, her Thanksgiving spread wasn’t nearly as heart stopping as I’d anticipated. There was only one deep fried item (a turkey), a couple pan fried items (bacon wrapped bread sticks and creamed corn with bacon drippings) and one dessert disguised as a vegetable.
So this is the big episode of Lost everyone’s been waiting for. After a two week tease we finally see the aftermath of Ana Lucia killing Shannon. Will Sayid revert back to the stereotypical Iraqi we saw last season when he tortured Sawyer (but in his defense, it was Sawyer, and who didn’t want to shove bamboo up his fingernails?) and go after Ana Lucia? Well, we were not disappointed. It was a cracking good episode. And we even get our first Ana Lucia flashbacks and she turns out to be even more unpleasant than we first thought. Let’s put it this way. There is a reason the group of survivors led by Ana Lucia has been reduced to only four people. I’m starting to think there aren’t any Others and it’s all just an elaborate ruse for everyone to get as far away from that bitch as humanly possible.
If it’s a wacky camera angle and weird characters you know you’ve entered the world of Good Eats, The flagship show of Food Network. I first became aware of Good Eats a few years ago when I was clicking through the channels and came upon his show. The only reason I paused to watch it was because I thought Alton Brown looked like Luke Skywalker. And honestly, who wouldn’t watch a cooking show by Luke Skywalker? Except maybe those damn Sand People. Anyways, I was fascinated by his ability to teach you about cooking, as opposed to just cooking something and saying Yum-O!. I didn’t know a tomato in the fridge would ruin its flavor, or an artichoke is just a blossom of a giant thistle flower, but I do now. And I can now tell you the history of Teflon. And I am a better man for it.
Yes, Alton’s extremely anal retentive, and yes sometimes his gimmicky props go a little overboard. But I love him. I love him as deep and as pure as a mother loves her newborn, or a crack whore enjoys a hot bath. Or her crack. Either one. So without further ado, let us examine the cause of my heterosexual man crush on the man they call Alton Brown.
I’ll be honest, Semi-Homemade Cooking with Sandra Lee isn’t one of my usual Food Network guilty pleasures. Maybe it’s her rushed delivery that makes me jumpy and turns me off. Perhaps it’s her obsession with something called “Tablescapes” which until watching Sandra were completely foreign to me – as they shall remain. Or, perhaps it’s the fact that her “recipes” suck? That’s probably it.
I watched two of her shows for this special Thanksgiving TVgasm offering and that’s plenty, trust me (and remember, I love my Food Network). The first thing one notices is the Barbara Walters soft-filter on the cameras. Actually, that’s not true – usually, the first thing I notice about the show are Sandra’s gigantic sagging boobies. Unfortunately, on the first episode I watched, Ms. Lee wore a very modest/loose black blouse. Lame. I’m certainly not a “boob guy” at all, but c’mon Sandra, give me something I can work with here! Well, she did actually show us her cans – cans of soup, cans of sauces, cans of veggies… (See above) *Rimshot!*
My name is EdHill, and I am a Food Network junkie. I watch it all, from Michael “He’s not gay, he’s just from Napa Valley” Chiarello and his amazing lisp (I watch every week hoping he’ll say “caramelized”), to Rachael Ray’s fragile psyche, to Paula Deen’s fragile heart valves. I love it all. Who among us hasn’t TiVo’d Everyday Italian just to see how tight fitting Giada’s blouse will be, or hoping we will get a close-up of her massaging a meat product? I am the only person I know of that actually considered ordering the Good Eats DVD’s. So imagine my amazement when they took the top 7 “celebrity chefs” and put them all in a room together to cook a Thanksgiving meal. It’s the Food Network’s All Star Thanksgiving. Giada’s giant head and hand gestures next to Rachael Ray’s manic insanity? Sign me up.
Comments Off on Food Network: Too Many Cooks….Read the rest of EdHill's post »
I know what you’re thinking. It’s time for another Desperate Housewives recap where EdHill is just going to bitch and moan about how bad it is and insert a lame sports reference (A-Rod MVP? What a joke). Plot hole this, stupid storyline that. Well you know what smart guy? I’m not. Yep, for the first time this season I can honestly say it was a good episode. Nice and dark, the over the top goofiness kept in check and it really moved the storyline along. Even the creepy guy shackled in the basement was given something to do. Other than show off his ding dong that is. Speaking if genitalia, there is even an entire storyline involving homemade porn. How could I not love it?
As I’ve made mention over the last several months, I love the Food Network. I find myself watching it way more than what is probably considered normal. I can cook, sure, and I do – but I think I’d watch it regardless. I like many of the personalities for different reasons and find myself really disliking only a few – Emeril and Flay spring to mind. Hell, I even watched every episode of “The Next Food Network Star.” (Which, by the way, appears to be the only show where the winner actually got the show they’re promised.)
Anyone who watches Paula Deen knows about her affinity for fat. Her “thing” is to drop whole sticks of butter into just about everything she cooks, from desserts to salads. To Paula, “Southern Cooking” is merely a euphemism for, “Artery Clogging Death Diet.” So I present to you: “The Paula Deen Coronary Watch” after the jump.