True Blood: The Dumbening

This week’s True Blood was a bit of a breather episode. Don’t get me wrong, freaky shit happened and pretty people took off their clothes, but it was strangely tame on the True Blood scale of weirdness. Let’s face it, though, after maenad orgy and nationally televised spine removal, sometimes it’s nice to just sit back and let Eric act like an idiot for an episode. Plus, we get yet another magic … uh … creature? Thing? Whatever, he/she/it will have a sex scene by episode five.

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Big Brother 13: Liveblog 7/14

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07.13.11 | Big Brother, Liveblog 

Big Brother 13: Live Blog Thursday 7/14

Howdy MSRies. The fabulous honeybunny and I will be hosting our first Big Brother 12 live blog tomorrow. Insightful commentary and/or drunken snark will commence at 6 PM PDT, 9 PM EDT, and everyone in between will just have to count on your fingers to figure it out. For those not on the east coast, live feeds can be found at videobrother.

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True Blood: Pining for the Fjords

In case you haven’t noticed, True Blood has returned to grace our TV screens with nudity, blood and general insanity. I have some thoughts that must be shared! Questions that must be answered! Or at least asked then forgotten when Eric takes his shirt off! Let’s have a brief confab about the first two episodes.

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06.22.11 | Advertising 

Advertising: The Notorious V.A.G.

Way back in the day, when I used to actually recap more than one show a year, I covered The Bachelor over at TVgasm. We had a contest to come up with the female version of the cock block. While I expected to get maybe five or six entries, I ended up getting over 30. Not too bad. But not nearly as impressive as the Mooncup, an insertable, reusable, silicon menstrual cup.

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06.14.11 | Game of Thrones 

Game of Thrones is the new Lost. There, I said it.

If you know me you know my love for Lost was a one of a kind love/hate affair. With it now off the air I have ben searching for a new “watch live instead of DVR” tier show, which as anyone with a DVR knows, is the higest compliment. I finally found it in Game of Thrones.

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05.19.11 | News, The Walking Dead 

The Walking Dead: CDC Guidelines

Just in time for this Saturday’s Judgment Day, the CDC has published guidelines on surviving the Zombie Apocalypse.

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Survivor Redemption Island: The Dying Gasps of a Beloved Franchise

Ugh, I don’t even care anymore. I can’t remember how long it’s been since a season felt this flat to me. All these characters are boring, aside from Phillip. Rob is just one-note, and it’s no fun watching someone easily win. I’m sure the final Tribal Council will be interesting, as long as Rob and Phillip make it to the end (and it would be even better with Matt), but it just feels SO FAR AWAY. So, I’m not recapping this entire episode, once again. I’m on strike. Until this season gets interesting again. So instead, I’m just going to complain.

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Survivor Redemption Island: Ricism

Um, this is going to be kind of uncomfortable. Being a white, middle-class kid, I don’t have much perspective on what it’s like to be a black person growing up in the 1960s. So I don’t want to make light of the issues that arise in this Very Special Episode of Survivor. However, this is, after all, just a stupid reality show, and shit gets RIDICULOUS this episode, for no good reason. So let me issue this disclaimer up front: I think racism is awful. I think everyone should be treated equally. When I call Phillip – or anyone else, for that matter – “crazy,” it’s simply because they’re acting in a way I find absurd, illogical, or downright insane. I have never used the word “crazy” in place of the n-word. In fact, I didn’t even know it COULD be a racial slur. The More You Know, I guess. Anyway, point is: Racism is awful, none of us here are (hopefully) racists, and we are all colorblind when it comes to making fun of lunatics on a stupid TV show. So, white, black, Asian, or fucking vampire, if you are being dumb, I will make fun of you. Also, some of my closest friends are black. Let’s recap Survivor!

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Survivor Redemption Island: Drinking the Kool-Aid

Okay, let’s be real here: This episode was super dull. As a result, I’m slacking once again in my recapping duties. But this time, it’s not because I’m too busy; I just didn’t give a shit about this episode. Thankfully, CBS didn’t give a shit about it, either, and they sped us through two extremely predictable eliminations. Tonight’s episode better speed through the next three eliminations as well, because it’s looking like this season is taking a major turn for the worse. Thanks, Rob.

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